Pineapples don't have beards
by Saxiphones bring out my eyes
Summary: Shawn might have met his soul mate in the one person who can prove he's a fake. But if all of that goes wrong he can always get a pineapple funnel cake at the snack stand. Shawn/OC  TAKES PLACE AT THE CIRCUS
1. The Talk

**A/N: Okay, so I fixed this up a little, because I was planning to write another chapter, and I read the first few I wrote and was appalled at what I saw. I'm surprised ya'll didn't track me down and punch me in the jaw! Please comment, with anything you feel like saying, as long as it is not too harsh, I will try and reply to all of your comments via private message. (I still have only an ending in mind, so if anyone has any plot ideas, just shoot! xD)**

**I do not own anything, except for some pineapple.**

**BTW, Shawn's ring tone is a really stupid song, and as soon as I heard it, I thought of this show.**

**1989:**

"Gus" Henry Spencer said, into his 'kiss the cop' coffee mug his son had gotten him as a last minute Christmas gift two years ago, "what do you have there?"

"Uh- I- this month's _Sports Illustrated_?" Gus lied.

"Come here." Henry frowned, taking the _playboy_ out of his son's best friend's hands, "Did Shawn put you up to this?"

Gus's eyes widened a little with fear, not wanting to give his friend up, but not wanting to be accused of having pornography on his person. He had seen what happens to kids at school with magazines like this, and it wasn't pretty.

Henry could tell that he wasn't going to get an answer out of Gus; he was more likely to get jack-o-lantern designs from a pumpkin on Halloween.

"SHAWN" he called up the stairs, never looking away from the television or his spanish soap opera.

Shawn carefully climbed down the stairs and peered out at his father, who proceeded to pat the couch on either side of him, signaling the two friends to sit.

"What is this Shawn?"

"Um, Rabbit enthusiast weekly?"

"Shawn. Where did you even get this?"

"I paid Jimmy Thompson $13 and a pack of gum for it"

"What have I told you about objectifying women?"

"That its wrong, and immature"

"Exactly, what you are going through is normal, all boys have sexual feelings about women, but that doesn't mean that you have to read _these _magazines"

"I get it dad-" Shawn said hurriedly getting up from the couch

"No Shawn sit down, we need to talk about this. You need to be prepared for when you like a girl enough to take that _next step_ with a her"

After hearing this Gus let out a little whimper, and peered over at Shawn, who looked like he had just seen a ghost.

**Present Day:**

Shawn made his way onto the lawn of one of the creepiest houses he had ever been to, thanking god that he was just here for a yard sale. He walked over to one of the boxes marked 50 cents. Standing around round the box were two guys, if you could even call them that. One looked about 19 with red hair, and a face that was so pimply Shawn couldn't help think of his own high school years, the other was a guy, was most likely late forties, a greasy comb over, and glasses, as thick as the bottom of wine bottles.

"So what have we got here?" Shawn said cheerily, as he made his way over to the box. After seeing the content of the box, his brain, as if on auto-pilot, filled with thousands apon thousands of jokes, and even limericks.

"Welcome to the sex train. Starring Ted Mosbey." he let out a little chuckle, and looked at the other two,"Now why do we need to know who stars in it?" he asked, deliberately trying to make them uncomfortable. They both grimaced, and went back to rummaging through the box.

"Do the pixelated pineapple, do the pixelated pineapple" Shawn picked up the phone after two rings.

"You Rang?" he answered in his best Lurch impression.

"Mr. Spencer."

"Oh! Hey chief, what's up?"

"You are needed Down at the precinct immediately. We have a case for you."

"Awesome, let me just call Gus-"

"There is no need for that, Mr. Guster is already down here."

"Okay," Shawn said, a little confused "I'll be right over."

**Twenty minutes later:**

Shawn was in The Chief's office with the chief, and Gus.

"So let me get this straight" he paused and rubbed his eyebrows vigorously "you want us, to spend a week in the circus."

"Mr. Guster, you have known me for 4 years now, do you really think that I would have asked you to do this for us if i was not serious?"

"Fine, but what on earth made you think that we would be okay with this?"

"Maybe the fact that we are!" Shawn said, jumping at a chance at a paying job, he needed money for a new juicer.

"Wonderful! Now we were contacted by the Atlantic City Police Department, about something that can only be described as a cocaine Tsunami. Millions of dollars worth of drugs being moved through a traveling circus run by a man who goes by the name Dr. Mrcount," everyone gave her odd looks as she continued, "Yes I know, my best guess is that he doesn't really get the concept of titles. But anyway we are going to go undercover to try and bust this thing once and for all, and by we, I mean you."

"This is so cool our first real undercover case. This is so exciting!" Shawn giggled, doing a little dance until he saw the disapproving look coming from Gus.

"Ya sure that's easy for you to say Shawn, you aren't deathly afraid of women with beards"

"Gus, that is a completely irrational fear." Shawn sighed, he and the other man had had this conversation countless times before.

"It is not _Shawn_ its called Pogonophobia and it is a completely rational fear, there is a convention every year for people trying to beat it. I used to go every year, until we got into the detective business."

"Sure, whatever you say."

"Okay you two are free to go." The chief chimed in, clearly annoyed with the banter

"Cool, I have a new train movie to watch!" Shawn said, winking to Gus, and walked out.

**Later that night:**

Shawn was back at the office, shamefully watching his fifth pre-recorded episode of _Ghost Cat_, when McNabb walked in.

"Oh hey Buzz!" Shawn said with authentic enthusiasm, "You want a beer?" he said signaling to the fridge.

"Oh no thanks Shawn, I'm just here to drop these off for the Chief" He handed a bag of clothes to Shawn with a classic Buzz grin, and then made his way towards the door.

"Thanks" Shawn shouted as McNabb left the office, "GUUUUSSSS the Chief sent us a package!" He then called to Gus.

"Well open it!" The other man called from the other room.

"But I want you to be here when we find out what is inside, aren't you excited? Who knows what it could be, it could be a self destructing video tape, or a set of instructions to murder someone I care about, the grilled pineapple vender for example-"

"Just open the bag Shawn." by this time Gus had found his way to Shawn, and the mystery bag.

"This. Is. So. Cool!" Shawn said jumping up and down like a teenage girl, "drum roll please!"

Gus just rolled his eyes. He hadn't seen Shawn this excited since he found out that they put pineapple on pizza. But he made a drumming noise anyways.

"No Gus, a proper drum roll."

"Shawn!"

"Fine, fine, but I don't see why you are so… Lassie adjacent, this week."

"_Shawn_!"

Shawn opened the bag with such theatricality; it would make a Broadway actor roll their eyes. They both peered in.

"Oh no way!"

**Additional A/N: I didn't mention it at the top, but yes, I did reference How I met your mother, it was just kind of uncomfortable thinking of a porno title**


	2. clown shoes

**A/N: I had so much fun writing the last chapter I decided to keep on writing this story. Please review! I love all reviews, constructive, or if you just want to write random crap like what your favorite color it**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything; except for a neflix account I use to watch Psych**

**P.S. I put a hidden pineapple reference in this chapter if you message me and tell me what it is, I will add you into the story somewhere, as a suspect, or something along those lines.**

**1989:**

"Okay Joey, think," Tina Harris said handing her daughter an _Aspirin_ "Before it went dark what was the man doing"

Joey thought hard, she had only been having the visions for about a year now, and they were hell on her head.

"Um, I don't know, my head still really hurts Mom"

"I know sweetie, but it's really important that you think back to what he said, somebody's life might depend on it"

"Umm ok," she winced as pain ran through her head " I think he said he was taking her to that library that is under construction on Wilson st."

"Oh thank you so much honey," Tina said kissing Joey on the head. She ran out the door grabbing her gun on the way

"Don't mention it" Joey said sighing and falling back onto the couch.

She then got up, walked into the kitchen and got out a beer... so what if she was six... her mom would never find out.

**Present day:**

Joey couldn't stand this. She had been unemployed for almost five months now. She had had such a wonderful job too; at least she did until she had that vision. What was she supposed to do though? Let him embezzle all of that money?

"So it's decided, I will be employed by the end of this week," She said into her phone.

"You go girl, if I know you, you'll be employed before dinner, now that you have really set your mind to it"

It was her best friend Lisa. They had known each other since college, and she was the one person that she could always count on.

"Ha, thanks for the _you go girl_. You know how much enthusiastic encouragement brightens my day"

"You can count on me. _What? What? No just tell him that one size fits all, HUH? I don't care if one size REALLY fits all, just tell him that!_ Sorry I have to go Chica, temperamental customers. Love you, call me when you got yourself a job"

"Okay talk 'atcha later"

Joey sighed. She had no idea where to start. She had had a total of two jobs in her entire life, the first her dad got for her at the discount store, down the road from her childhood house, the second was with her ex-boyfriend's family's company, he was her ex ever since she closed down the company, and landed his dad in prison. So in the nutshell, she knew absolutely nothing about how to find a job.

That was until she turned the page of her newspaper and saw this:

_**Psychic Solves 25th case for the SBPD!**_

_Psychic Shawn Spencer and his partner Bruton Gaster have solved 25 cases for the Santa Barbra Police Department, including catching the notorious Mr. Yang. Along with solving cases for the Police, the partners own their own detective agency PSYCH on the corner of Arrellaga and Sola, so if you are ever in need of a supernatural mystery solver just call 7462753_

_Shit_ she thought. The last time she voluntarily had a vision, she was still in pigtails and fawning over NPH as Doogie Howser. But it was getting to the point where if she even heard the word _Cup of Noodles _she gagged a little bit. So she had to roll up her sleeves and swallow her pride, because it was time to get her Psychic on.

**One Hour Later:**

She was standing in front of the psych office, metaphorical magnifying glass in hand, along with a real résumé.

She walked in and immediately burst out laughing.

"WHAT THE HE- ahahahaha-LL ohohohaahahahaha Oh IM SORRY IM sorry… whew I'm sorry."

Standing in front of her was two guys, she assumed were Shawn and Gus, decked out in full on clown gear.

The first one –Shawn- was the sad clown, and the other –Gus- was the happy one.

"Um can we help you?" Shawn asked a confused smile, contradicting his painted frown

"Oh, yes two things actually. Well first of all, I'm your one o'clock, and secondly, I will give you everything I own in the world for a picture with the two of you."

"Oh right!" Gus exclaimed "Joey right? You're here for the job interview."

"Job interview, Gus I thought we agreed not to have a secretary after the whole _Agency_ debacle"

"Um, excuse me? I'm here interviewing to be a PI, I'm a psychic. Just like you." _If you even are psychic, _she added under her breath.

"Ya well we already have a Psychic working here, hence the name, I don't really think we need another one" he said, his voice _dripping_ with self-importance.

"Ha, Gus told me over the phone you might do this, do you need proof?" she asked and quirked an eyebrow.

"Fine, AMAZE me!" Shawn said sarcastically

She took a few steps so that she was standing about 4 inches away from him, and then gripped his shoulder. Her stomach lurched as she was flung into the brain of Shawn Spencer. "You are thinking about Jim, from the blazing saddles, Now you are thinking about what Gus here would look like with a Mohawk, The plastic thing on the end of the shoelace, Johnny Appleseed, Pineapple (?), Eeew, stop thinking about me naked. Oh and FYI I look so much better than that without clothes on." She stepped back, removing her hand, and feeling as if she could breath again.

Shawn's mouth was agape when she opened her eyes. She let a satisfied smirk sneak through onto her face.

She was now about 92% sure that he was a fake, but she needed the money, and He was amusing enough.

"So do I have the job?"

"Uh ya!" Shawn sounded slightly disappointed, and slightly amazed as he said it.

"Can you start by tomorrow? We have a big case starting soon that I'm sure the Chief would let you in on," Gus said, taking off one of the ridiculously large clown shoes.

"Of course that is amazing, I assume, y'all are paid per case?"

"Indizzle" Shawn said

"Pardon me?"

"Its rap, for indeed."

"Oh…" she thought about that for a second "I like it."

"So we will see you tomorrow?"

"Indizzle" she said with a smile and walked out

As she was walking away, she heard one of them say _well isn't she something_


	3. Psychics don't have Cooties

**A/N: 3rd CHAPTER! YAY, I am having so much fun writing this! So I will now put my HIMYM fic of hiatus. Well I hope you enjoy this chapter. It is a little short, and I am not really a fan of it. But give me credit; I was exhausted, and sick while I wrote it. chapter will be in Gus' perspective.**

**1989:**

Henry Spencer watched from his front porch as his son suck his tounge out at a young girl with tear-stained cheeks, and pigtails down her back.

Shawn ran up the walkway and into the house.

"Shawn."

Henry heard his footsteps stop abruptly.

"Who was that girl?"

Shawn walked outside with a frown plastered on his face.

"Macy Jones, she sits next to me in class."

"And why were you being so rude to her?"

"Because she's gross, she has cooties!" he screamed the last part, so that Macy, who had started to walk away, could hear.

"Shawn. I had a partner for about three years, which I absolutely could not stand. I mean that man could annoy me like no other man could. To give you an idea of just how Exasperating he was, he once spent an entire hour talking about the Donor party. But you know what I did?"

"What?"

"I talked to him, found out common interests, found out what he was like, even though I didn't want to."

"Okay I get it dad." Shawn muttered, walking back into the house.

"Shawn." Henry said, and pointed out-ward.

Shawn sighed and ran out to catch Macy.

**Present day:**

Shawn and Joey were in the blueberry (despite much protest on Gus's part) on the way to the precinct to meet the Chief. She wasn't thrilled about the idea of Joey going with them to the AC, and needed to talk to her to get some closure.

So now, Shawn was forced to sit in an ridiculously quiet car for twenty minutes. He realized about thirty seconds in that he was going to have to do the one thing he knew how to: talk.

"So, _Joey_, Joey Joey Joey, anything I should know about you? Favorite fruit? Shameful celebrity crush? Mysterious past?" He wiggled his eyebrows at her.

She let out a little laugh "Favorite fruit, Pluot. Half plum, half apricot, _awesome!_ Shameful celebrity crush? That would have to be Neil Patrick Harris. I know he's gay, and there is a chance that we are distant relatives, but still, _how adorable is he_? And the only mysterious part of my past is why on earth I decided to wear flashdance t-shirts and leg warmers for three years as a teenager."

"Wow, leg warmers, that surprises me, You strike me as more of a shoulder pads kind of girl."

"Ha, nope, warmers all the way."

Shawn laughed a little, _NO!_ He thought, _don't let her get to you! "_Oh wait, shit. You could hear all of that couldn't you?" he asked.

"No, I can't just read people's minds, I have to touch people, but I can only assume that it wasn't good, why do you hate me so much?"

"I don't _hate_ you, It's just, if I'm being honest with myself, I'm a little jealous. I mean don't get me wrong, I'm an _awesome_ psychic-"

Joey gave him a skeptical glance.

"But you're not as good as me? I get it, not many are. You are pretty close though, considering what

you are."

"What I am?"

"Extremely observant, most likely a photographic memory. You really thought you could fool me? Well don't worry. I won't tell"

Shawn didn't have anything to say to that, so he just looked at the road for the rest of the drive, trying not to think of anything, something he found out was incredibly hard to do.

**After the drive:**

"Spencer!"

"L-DOG! What, on _earth_ are you wearing?"

Detective Carlton Lassiter walked up to the two, in one of the most ridiculous get-ups Shawn had ever seen. He was wearing what could only be described as a pair of leiterhosen drowning in chest hair, that, coupled with the faux handlebar moustache that had found itself a home on his upper lip, and it was all Shawn could do to not start rolling around on the floor.

"I don't know what's better, this or the clowns" Joey whispered to Shawn. "Joey Harris," She said reaching out for a handshake, "psychic."

"Oh dear god, they're multiplying" Lassiter said, a look of pure terror plastered on his face. He started to walk away, dropping Joey's hand.

"He does that a lot, you get used to it. Lassie! Wait! You haven't told us about why you're displaying your chest forest!"

Lassiter turned sharply around to face them. "Oh Ha Ha Spencer, Why don't you have a _vision_ and figure it out"

As Lassiter stormed away, Joey turned to whisper to Shawn, "Don't worry it was _all_ he was thinking about when he shook my hand."

**One laughing fit later:**

Chief Vick looked up from the paper work she was doing as Joey and Shawn walked into her office still letting out the occasional giggle.

"This must be Ms. Harris," she said shaking Joey's hand. "Nice to meet you. So lets get to it."

"Lets"

"You are going to have to Prove to me that you are good enough to work on this case. It is a very important one for us to solve, and we already have Mr. Spencer here, why should we hire you."

"Well," Joey started, putting her hand on The Chief's shoulder, "Your favorite movie is Saw III, but you tell people it's Gone with the wind, You ate roast beef, and Garlic toast for dinner two nights ago, and you really wish that Detective Lassiter had just waited for his pre-made costume instead of making his own."

The chief opened her mouth to ask Joey something, but she cut her off.

"First drawer?" she asked, pulling out the forms that would get her on the case.

Shawn watched all of this from a corner, feeling immensely over shadowed


	4. taquitos and gentlemen callers

**A/N:**

**IM BACK! Sorry it took so long to update, I did not have any access to my computer, for the last few weeks. Here is my return to Pineapples don't have Beards, with a small nudge towards the relationship that is to come.**

**Thank you to all the people who favorited, and reviewed!**

**Thank you to DreamWriter101 for finding the hidden pineapple in the previous chapter. She will be in one of the upcoming chapters as the first suspect.**

**For those of you who still can't find the Hidden Pineapple here is:**

**In the newspaper article the phone number for psych spells pinaple.**

**I hope you enjoy this Chapter!**

**1989:**

"Time out!" Joey shouted, exhausted. She had been playing tag for the past hour and was ready to eat something.

She walked up to the picnic table where her mom was sitting with Mr. O'Brien, her camp counselor. Her mother stiffened a little when she walked up, which confused Joey, until she noticed Mr. O'Brien's hand slowly creep back to his side of the table.

_Oh_ Joey thought. Her mother had taken up a few of these "Gentlemen Callers" since her Dad had moved out.

"Mom," She said, averting her eyes from Mr. O'Brien's wandering hands, "can I have some of that potato salad?"

"Sure pumpkin, let me get it."

"No its fine mom, you stay here" Joey prompted, winking as she walked away.

_Looks like I am going to have to have a sleepover tonight_ she thought to herself. She didn't realize it, but she was most likely the most mature six year old in her town, if not her entire state.

**Present Day:**

Joey was sitting in the backseat of the blueberry smashed in between Gus and Shawn, while Juliet and Lassiter Sat comfortably in the front. They were driving, not yet in their costumes, to the site of the circus. She had given up trying be a part of the back and forth between Shawn, Gus, and the detectives, and decided to just watch.

"Spencer! Stop kicking the back of my chair!"

"I'm not kicking it! I'm tapping to the beat of the music. There's a difference"

"Um Shawn there isn't any music on."

"Oh I'm sorry Gus. I forgot to tell you. I stole your ipod about an hour ago. I find the fact that you have five different versions of _The Lady is a Tramp_ on here, slightly depressing."

"That's a great song Shawn!"

As Gus continued to lecture Shawn on the importance of Frank Sinatra, She took out her phone to text Lisa, but something caught her eye. She noticed Lassiter Look at Juliet out of the corner of his eye, and then quickly looked back at the road. Juliet promptly blushed and let a little smile creep onto her face.

"And _furthermore,_ he brought a new style of music-"

"Shawn!" Joey whispered cutting Gus off mid rant, "How long has that," She nodded towards the front "been going on?"

"How long has _what_ been going on?"

"You're kidding me right? Just watch them for about five minutes, and you'll know what I'm talking about."

**5 min. later:**

"Spencer what happened, I don't think I have ever heard you be this quiet since that time you had laryngitis... that was a good week."

Shawn's jaw was hanging agape, and Joey couldn't help but giggle.

"I don't know how I never saw it before" Gus whispered

"Don't talk so loud, I'm not even sure they know yet!" Joey growled, punching Gus on the arm.

"Ow! What was that! I can't even punch that hard"

"Oh come on Gus, don't be a not that hungry hippo, of course you can't punch that hard, you are the equivalent of my little pony when you are fighting"

"You mean I might not be that strong, but I look damn good?" Gus asked with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

"Sure we'll go with that."

Joey's stomach suddenly lurched. _Oh god_ Joey thought _here come those gas station Taquitoes!_

"Pull over!" She shouted

"We can't pull over, were making such good time!"

"Listen Lassiter, unless you want to revisit lunch, and the three slushies I drank you will pull this car over right now!"

"Oh god, okay" Lassiter said pulling the car to a stop, pursuit style, which definitely did not help the state her stomach was in.

As soon as the car had come to a stop she dove out of it and purged herself of her discount lunch she had scarffed down just two hours beforehand. She went to the trunk and got out her toiletries bag and found her mouthwash.

She back into the car her mouth smelling of peppermint and bile.

"I am so sorry guys, I'm so embarrassed!" she said avoiding their faces. She had never been comfortable with throwing up in front of people; she wasn't even comfortable with throwing up alone for that matter.

"Don't be!" Shawn comforted "Gus throws up almost _everytime _he sees a dead body, even on TV! You have nothing to be embarrassed about."

"Thanks." She said, her eyes drooping. She was exhausted, after getting up at five this morning, changing into her costume, and that whole _vomiting_ episode, she was ready to go to sleep.

"Do you mind if I take a little nap? I think I'll die if I don't get some sleep" she yawned

"No problem" Gus and Shawn said in unison.

_Ew, creepy._ She thought before closing her eyes. She fell asleep almost instantly.

Her head slipped to the side and onto Shawn's shoulder as she dozed.

"Shit" Shawn groaned to himself as she snuggled a little closer to him in her sleep.

**A/N: sorry about the shortness. I was just trying to get myself back into the writing swing, after my short hiatus**


	5. Don't break Gus's Car

**A/N: I'm so happy about this chapter! I love Lassiet with a burning passion! So they will almost definitely be at the circus in the next chapter. Thank you to everyone who reviewed and favorited! Please continue!**

Detective Carlton Lassiter hated road trips, he hated costumes, and he hated that _psychic_. There was one thing however, he did not hate, Juliet O'hara. In fact, he was enamored with her, had been for about two years, and she had yet to notice him. But that didn't discourage him. He still stole glances, did favors, and tried to initiate contact at any point possible. At the moment he was sitting quietly in the front seat listening to the hushed conversation in the back.

"Gus, get Joey off of me." Shawn whined like a school child.

"I'm enjoying this Shawn, get her off yourself" they both giggled and bumped knuckles.

Lassiter rolled his eyes and glanced over at Juliet, who had also fallen asleep. She stirred a little as he pulled her blanket up and tucked it behind her shoulders. Suddenly the snickers from the back seat subsided. He scanned the dumbfounded expressions of Shawn and Guster.

"Her shivering was, uh," _the most adorable thing I've ever heard,_ "getting on my nerves" _nice save._

"nice save." Gus muttered to Shawn, but Lassiter didn't hear him because the car started to make clanking noises and began to slow down. He pulled over to the side of the road.

"Uh Oh, Lassiter what's going on? did you ruin my car? This is a company car! I swear to god-"

"Guster! Shut Up! Its probably nothing!"

**2 hours later:**

Juliet O'hara awoke to the sound of a car door slamming. She looked out the window to see something she considered to be the single hottest thing she had ever seen. Carlton Lassiter with dirt smudges all over his face, sweaty from hard work.

"Oh my god." she said under her breath

"What was that?" Joey asked. Juliet watched her realize that she was still leaning against Shawn, and straighten out.

"Uh, I said, Oh my god, what happened to the car?"

"Oh, we're not sure, Detective Lassiter-"

"Please," Shawn interrupted, "call him Lassie"

"um okay, _Lassie, _has been out there for about two hours now." Joey said pointing outside.

"HA!" Juliet heard Lassiter shout from behind the opened hood. The car shook as he slammed it closed. It was all Juliet could do to keep from drooling as Lassiter, rough and rugged, made his way back to the driver seat.

"It was just a small engine problem, but we should be good now." he said scanning their faces.

"Lassiter its getting dark, and you look exhausted. We should probably find a hotel soon." Juliet said, a plan forming in her head.

"Are you sure? There is only like four more hours to go."

"I insist."

And with that they were on the road again, but not for long.

**35 minutes & a few anything but accidental room mix-ups later:**

"Oh crap, there's only one bed. If you want, I can go get another room." Lassiter said, hoping she wouldn't accept his generosity, a night in a bed with Juliet, that was the dream.

"No! Thats fine! the bed is big enough for two." Juliet said a little too eagerly.

It had taken a lot of whispering with the hotel's manager to get this 'accident' to happen. She had always found Lassiter attractive, I mean who wouldn't? He had the perfect ratio of salt to pepper in his hair, a muscular body, and piercing blue eyes. But today, after seeing him all rugged and dirty, she finally gave in to her attraction, and started hatching a plan.

"Um Why don't you take a shower?" She asked, trying to buy herself some time "you'll, uh, sleep more comfortably."

"Ok, thanks!" he responded, grabbing a towel and walking onto the small tiled bathroom.

As soon as she heard the water turn on she raced out to the car, opened the trunk, then her suitcase. She rummaged through it, until she came to what she was looking for.

_perfect_ she thought to herself.

**Meanwhile in Shawn, Gus, and Joey's room:**

"So whad'ya think they're doing?" Gus asked.

"Sex." Joey replied through a mouthful of toothpaste.

**Back at Juliet, and Lassiter's room:**

Lassiter finished his shower and turned off the water. He grabbed his towel roughly drying his hair, and then tied it around his waist. Next, he grabbed his tooth brush and applied a healthy amount of toothpaste.

As he brushed his teeth, he thought, and eventually his mind wandered to that morning when had convinced the Chief to let him stay on this case, despite his earlier, um, _efforts_.

_Damn that fake moustache, I should have known that put the costume one step too far _he thought as he spit out his toothpaste

He dropped his towel and reached for his pajamas. He loved his pajamas. They were blue with little guns on them, but despite anything Shawn said, they were not _cute, _if anything they were manly as hell.

He thought he heard someone curse and then he heard a thud.

"Juliet are you O...Kay?"

He couldn't believe what he was seeing. There was Juliet, climbing up from the floor, in what _had_ to be _the _sexiest lingerie he had ever seen. It was light pink lace, with little embroidered flowers, _it suites Juliet_ he thought_ sexy, while still being absolutely adorable._

"Oh my god, I'm sorry, this wasn't supposed to happen! you were supposed to come out, and I was gonna be all sexy, and then-"

She didn't even get to finish her ramble, because she was cut off by a kiss. Not just any kiss, the kiss it seemed she had been waiting for her whole life.

"wow" she panted.

"wow" he returned.

He slowly stood up, pulling her with him. He never let go of her hand as they made their way to the bed.

"You have no idea how long I have wanted to do this." He said as he flipped her over so that she was underneath him.

"I think I do." she whispered back


	6. Car Games

**A/N: So this chapter is nothing great, but it has been forever since I wrote for this story, so I thought that I'd add a chapter.**

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed while I was taking a break from this story.**

Shawn woke up and turned around. He smiled as light puffs of air hit his face rhythmically. He put his arm around his bedmates slender waist, and pulled them close. The person snuggled into his shoulder. Shawn placed his head lovingly atop the others, feeling their smooth scalp against his cheek. Wait... what?

Shawn eyes snapped open as he looked down at Gus. He scrambled out of the bed pushing Gus away. "Gus! What the hell man?"

"The couch got cold!" Gus said rubbing his eyes sleepily.

"So you decided to climb into bed with me?" Shawn yelled.

They both heard a snicker from the other bed. Joey had woken up, and was red faced trying hard to keep her laughter in.

Shawn sighed, shook his head and walked into the bathroom to get ready.

**15 minutes later:**

They all climbed into the car, the same seats as yesterday. Shawn couldn't help but notice the look exchanged between Lassiter and Juliet.

"So!" Joey chirped, "once we get... Where we are going, where are we going to be staying?"

"We have been provided with two trailers for us to stay in."

"Trailers. As in trailer parks?" Joey asked.

"Those are the ones." Lassiter said, enjoying the twinge of dissapointment in her voice.

"COOL!" She replied, "When I was little I always tried to get my mom to let us move into one... she never would..."

**30 minutes later:**

"I spy with my little eye, something red."

"_OH MY GOD THE FREAKING NOSE IN THE BAG IN THE FRONT SEAT!" _

"_Woah Lassie!_ Why the freak out?"

"Because _Shawn _that is what your _little eye_ has spied the past _14_ rounds!"

**10 minutes later:**

"You know what rocks?"

"What?"

"Boobs."

"What the hell Joey?"

"Well they do..."

"How much sleep did you get last night?"

"Not enough Gus... not enough"

**1 hour later:**

"99 BOTTLES OF BEER ON TH-"

"NO."

**45 minutes later:**

"Are you Richard Nixon?"

"Nope"

"Are you Ronald Reagan?"

"Nu uh"

"Are you Sonny Bono?"

"No."

"Are you Neil Patrick Harris?"

"YEEEES!"

"Dude... Joey, you have a problem."

**1 hour and 15 excruciating minutes later:**

"Are we there yet?"

"YES SPENCER THIS TIME WE ARE ACTUALLY THERE! I swear to god, you are like a child when you get-"

But Shawn, Joey and Gus were already out the door.

Shawn took a deep breath and immediately regretted it. The smell that awaited him was _not _the cotton candy soaked happiness that he had expected. Instead he was greeted by the pungent odor of stale popcorn and urine. He gagged a little, and then looked around, just in time to see Lassie drive off to hide the blueberry.

"So I guess we're on our own for a while huh guys?"

But Gus and Joey were already at the trailer lot. They appeared to have found theirs, and Shawn could only assume they were going to go get changed, so he followed.

**10 minutes later:**

"So I was totally right" Joey said as she turned away from the two men and pulled her shirt over her head. "They slept together. You both owe me 5 bucks."

"Uhhh-" Shawn said, staring at Joey's bare back.

"I think that means we never bet you." Gus said putting the last of his makeup on.

"It was implied!" Joey whined as she put the last of _her_ palm reader get up on.

Shawn shook his head, trying to focus, "It most certainly was not!"

"Was too!" She said, pulling out her phone, and flopping down on the bed, which let out a groan and a creak as she did. She started to pull up a new message for Lisa when there was a knock on the trailer door. In walked Lassiter, in a new sword thrower costume, matching that of Juliet.

"We should go mingle with the others so we can gain their trust." Juliet said, 'discreetly' holding the other detectives hand behind his back.

"Juliet, they aren't wild animals! No that would be a much easier situation... If there's anything that I have learned from countless hours of pop culture observation, its that carnies and circus folk are dark, solitary people, who don't trust newcomers... follow my lead." Shawn explained, and the bound out of the trailer.

"Shawn!" Gus called after him and they all raced after him, including Joey, who left her phone on the bed, forgetting to text Lisa


End file.
